


With Our Lives

by themadmage



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe, Blood and Injury, F/M, Gen, Harry Potter Has a Sibling, Harry Potter does not go to Hogwarts, Harry Potter is Not a Horcrux, Hogwarts Era, James Potter Lives, Lily Evans Potter Lives, M/M, Minor Character Death, No Boy-Who-Lived (Harry Potter), Post-First War with Voldemort, Pre-Hogwarts, Sirius Black Free from Azkaban, Tags May Change, The first war and the second war are one war, Warnings May Change, different horcruxes, not the story where the Potters neglect one child in favor of the other
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-11
Updated: 2019-05-29
Packaged: 2019-10-08 09:00:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 13,131
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17383598
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/themadmage/pseuds/themadmage
Summary: What if the Potters didn't take Sirius' advice and switch Secret Keepers? Voldemort doesn't find them, and James and Lily don't die, but there is also no celebration and no thirteen-year peace.Harry is raised in hiding. He cannot have play-dates or go to school. He grows up isolated with only his extended family and Albus Dumbledore for company.





	1. Secret Keeper

Sirius looked down at his godson, who had just fallen asleep in his crib, and smiled softly. He'd never thought he could love another person this much, but Harry was the light of his life. Harry loved Sirius just as much, even thought he couldn't tell anyone yet at not quite one year old - Sirius who had a natural talent for handling him, and could quiet him when he fussed more easily than even his mother.

Sirius turned to look at James and Lily in the nursery doorway, where they'd watched him put Harry down for bed, and sighed heavily.

"I don't think I should be your secret keeper."

"Sorry?" James asked, affronted. "Come again, mate, because it sounded like you just said you shouldn't be our secret keeper."

"I did."

"Boys," Lily whispered, "let's talk about this in the sitting room, shall we? We don't want to wake Harry." Sirius and James nodded and followed her out of the nursery, James activating the baby monitor charms before closing the door. "So," she said, louder now that they were away from Harry's room, "What's gotten into your thick head now, Siri?"

"I don't think I should be your secret keeper."

James opened his mouth, but Lily silenced him with a raised hand. "You've said that, but why?"

"I'm the obvious choice. Everyone knows how close we are, as soon as they work out how you've gone into hiding they'll assume it's me. I'd die for you lot, but what if while they were chasing me they weren't even on the trail?"

"Then who do you think we should use?" James asked incredulously.

"Peter. No one would ever think it was him, you would be safe."

"What about Remus?" Lily asked.

Sirius almost growled. "I still don't trust Remus."

"Siri-"

"No, Lily. He's gone all the time, he never tells us anything anymore. If I'm wrong- if he's not the spy, then we can apologize later when we know who is. But if I'm right, and you make him your secret keeper and he goes and tells Voldemort, then we can't get your lives back."

Lily was torn, but James looked like the way forward was clear. "You're right that we can't get our lives back if we mess this up. But Padfoot, you're the only one I trust with our lives right now."

"Alright, mate. If that's what you want, I'll do it." James pulled Sirius into a tight hug, knocking the breath out of him momentarily. "We'll cast the charm, and I'll get Dumbledore's help shoring up the wards on my flat. I'll keep you safe."

"And you'll still be able to come by and put Harry to sleep for us," Lily joked. 

Sirius looked her in the eyes, endless love but no mirth visible in his own. "Grims and Dementors couldn't keep me away."


	2. Early Years

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The first chapter was short. They'll be longer now, but I wanted the decision that changes everything to stand on its own.

The Fidelius charm was cast, and in the beginning Sirius told no one the location of the house in Godric's Hollow, save for Madame Pomfrey in case of a medical emergency. Living in hiding ("Captivity," James would insist.) was not easy. They got a house elf to do their grocery shopping. Sirius visited the Potter family as often as he could - at least three times a week, but often daily, apparating directly into their front room.

It was Sirius who gave them the news in September of 1981 that the Longbottom family had taken too long to choose a secret keeper for themselves and the whole family had been slaughtered in the night. It was Sirius who held Lily as she cried for her friend Alice and her godson Neville. James needed to process in his own way, holding Harry close to his chest. Sirius had processed as much as he could before he came, so that he could be the strong one when he told them the news. 

 

James couldn't stand being cooped up inside all the time, so he occasionally went on Order missions disguised under polyjuice potion. Lily firmly put a stop to that on Halloween of 1981.

"Poppy's come by today. I'm pregnant - twelve weeks gone - and Harry is fifteen months old and if you think you're going to go out and die on a mission and leave me alone with two babies-" Lily choked on a sob, and James pulled her into his arms.

"That won't happen. I'll never leave you alone. I'll stop going on missions, love, I promise I'll be here for you and the kids." He rubbed Lily's back and whispered reassurances to her until she was able to stop crying.

"I'm due the 15th of May. We're having a girl."

 

When James' parents died - Dragonpox, of all things to die of during a war - they weren't able to have a funeral for them. The bodies were turned over to the Ministry, as any mourners would have been at risk even if the younger Potters didn't go, and Sirius and James spent the next days crying together and reminiscing over the people they'd both called Mum and Dad. Lily took care of Harry, and forced her boys to eat, and didn't pressure either of them to rub her sore feet or take care of the cravings and nausea she still alternated between. 

 

After joking one too many times about naming the baby  _Elvendork_ , Lily officially cut James and Sirius out of the process. She delivered late, on May 20th, with Poppy Pomfrey acting as a midwife and named her daughter Primrose Alice Potter. Messy black hair and green eyes seemed to be the lot of this generation of Potter children, as even as a newborn they could see that Primrose would have her mother's eyes.

Sirius was named godfather, partially because he was the only one of their friends to have actually  _met_ Primrose, and brought photos to the next Order meeting to show off his goddaughter. He reported back that everyone had found her suitably adorable and sent their congratulations. 

No other announcement of Primrose's birth was made. It was risky enough to tell the full Order, when a traitor was still in their midst, but they reasoned that knowing they had a second child wouldn't make Voldemort want to find them any more than he already did. Still, no reason to tempt fate with an announcement in the  _Prophet_. 

 

The war got worse. Voldemort and his Death Eaters were still killing people, finding their way into positions of power, and hunting Harry Potter. 

There was still a spy in the Order, and no one was to share details of their missions with anyone else until they were found. Order members were dying in nearly every raid - the Prewetts, the McKinnons, the Boneses, Caradoc Dearborn, Benjy Fenwick, Dorcas Meadowes, Elphias Doge, and so many more. New members were constantly recruited, but old members were killed or disappeared just as quickly.

In July of 1982, Peter Pettigrew turned up dead with the Dark Mark on his arm and the traitor to the Order of the Phoenix was found. 

 

Sirius didn't manage to tell the Potters about Peter for three days after it happened. He spent those three days sick from the near miss that the rest of the Order wasn't even aware of. When he finally did tell them, he couldn't be the strong one like he had when reporting the deaths of the Longbottoms. 

"I wanted to make him your secret keeper!" Sirius sobbed into James' chest. "I'd have sent you to your deaths!"

"No, that'd have been Peter," James replied gruffly, holding onto his best friend. "If we'd have gone with your plan, it wouldn't have been your fault any more than it was ours."

"But it was my idea!"

"Yes," Lily said, "and it would have been a terrible mistake. But all you did was trust the wrong person. Now, if you would tell  _Remus_ the secret so he can visit, I'd like very much to see him again. It's been almost a year since I've had an intelligent conversation."

Lily's jab at James and Sirius got them to smile a bit. On August 5th, a year to the day after the Fidelius was cast, the Potters were finally able to have visitors. 

 

There had been a brief moment when Lily had found out about Peter that she'd hoped they could come out of hiding. All too soon, she'd reminded herself that Voldemort still wanted her son dead. Still, they could fill a few people in on the secret of their home now that they didn't have to worry about one of them kidnapping Harry in the night

Remus was first on the list, of course. Many of the people James and Lily had hoped to have visit were dead now. Mary Macdonald, Lily's friend and Hogwarts roommate, was second. Albus Dumbledore was third. 

 

Six adults sat in the Godric's Hollow cottage, passing three-month-old Primrose between them while Harry, who had just turned two, hid his face in his godfather's robes. He was so young, and had been so isolated for so much of his life, that the sudden presence of three strangers was a bit overwhelming for him. Lily had hugged each guest tightly - even their Headmaster and Order general - so pleased to have company again. 

The group talked for hours, Albus being the first to leave, and Harry gradually warmed up to the newcomers and became his usual, talkative self. He still spoke in short two- or three-word sentences, but he was getting to the point where he was learning several new words every day and Lily warned their guests in no uncertain terms not to use any foul language around him. They were also not to say You-Know-Who's name within his earshot, because her innocent little boy was  _not_ going to be using his little baby's voice for babbling about _Voldemort_. 

Around eight o'clock Mary said her goodbyes and apparated away, leaving Lily and the children alone with the three remaining Marauders. Immediately, the air grew thick with tension. "Well, I'll address the elephant in the room," Lily said plainly. She was met with two blatantly confused looks from Sirius and James and one rather amused one from Remus. "Have I not introduced you lot to this muggle phrase? The elephant in the room - it's something everyone is aware of but no one wants to mention. Remus, I never thought you were the spy. I even suggested you as secret keeper when Sirius thought he might get cold feet."

"It wasn't cold feet!" Sirius protested. "I thought I was being clever."

"You think that a lot," Lily said fondly. 

"I didn't really think it was you either, Moony," James added. "I just thought - better safe than sorry, you know? Padfoot was so convinced, and I couldn't risk Lily and Harry no matter how much I wanted to have you here."

"Way to throw your secret keeper under the train," Sirius muttered bitterly.

"Bus, Sirius," Lily corrected him. 

Sirius sighed, then. "I suspected you, Moony, and I shouldn't have. I never even thought it might be Peter. I- This is going to sound bad, but please hear me out before you get angry." Sirius waited for Remus to nod before continuing. "I suspected you because you're a werewolf.  _Not_ because I think it makes you untrustworthy. We've all known for years and if you think I suddenly started having a problem with it after we graduated then I'll have to doubt your intelligence. But- the wizarding world is so hard on werewolves, and Voldemort- sorry Lily-  _he's_ gotten so many on his side by promising a better life that I thought maybe you'd decided it wasn't worth fighting anymore. I'm _sorry_ , Moony. Can you forgive me?"

"It's going to take time to rebuild our friendship, our trust," Remus said after a long silence, "but I think it'll be worth it. We've got so few people left to hold onto that I can't lose you while you're still right here. I admit, I suspected you at first as well. I worked out that I was wrong much earlier, of course, after you were made secret keeper and the secret stayed secret. But I can't blame you for having doubts when I did too."

"Very good, boys," Lily said sweetly, "now hug it out."

"Hug! Hug!" Harry cheered.

Unable to deny the green-eyed little boy anything, Sirius pulled Remus into a solid embrace. Remus returned it after only a moment. Lily smiled, and left to ready Harry for bed now that she could be sure the Marauders were on peaceful terms. 

 

If Lily had known that visit would be the last time she saw Mary, she would have made her friend stay. As it was, they couldn't know, and Mary never found another opportunity to visit before she was killed on a mission less than a month later. 

Remus visited regularly. Lily and James got a little more news out of him than they'd been able to get out of Sirius. They'd always known he wasn't telling them everything, trying to spare them from hearing about dangers they couldn't prevent, but it didn't seem like they'd be coming out of hiding any time soon and not knowing was worse than anything. Remus brought newspapers and reports from Order meetings. Harry gradually warmed up to the werewolf and stopped becoming so shy whenever he visited. It helped, of course, that Remus brought chocolate with him every time he came and was always willing to share it with the little boy.

 

James and Lily were becoming restless. Protecting their family was, of course, their number one priority but they still longed to do something for the struggling Order. Albus came to visit in September at their request, and by the time he left they had agreed that Lily could brew potions and James could make emergency portkeys. It wasn't much, but it was more than they'd been able to do for the last year. It was something.

 

In April of 1983, Sirius went missing. Remus and Dumbledore visited to tell the Potters as soon as he missed his second check in with the Order, but James and Lily had already suspected. It had been a week since Sirius had visited.

Albus delivered the news, gave his assurance that the Order was searching for him, and took his leave. Remus stayed. Lily made a fresh pot of tea when the first went cold, but no one was drinking it. It only gave her something to do. Primrose cried, having woken from her nap, and James went to fetch her. 

"What happens-" Remus asked, voice rough, "What happens if he doesn't come back?" There was no worry that Sirius would give away the secret, not now, but Remus couldn't bring himself to say the word 'die' in relation to his newly reconnected friend. 

"He'll come back. Sirius always does." Lily's words were more confident than her voice.

Remus, ever the realist, asked again. "But what if he doesn't? What happens to you?"

"If the secret keeper for a fidelius charm dies," Lily's voice barely cracked, to her credit, "then everyone who knows the secret becomes a secret keeper. That would mean you, Albus, and Poppy."

"Not you and James?"

"We don't know the secret, we  _are_ the secret."

Remus nodded, and the conversation was put to bed as James came back into the room with Harry and Primrose. 

 

Late at night on the 19th of May, 1983 James and Lily sat awake with tears in their eyes. Tomorrow was Primrose's first birthday, and there had been no progress in finding her godfather. He'd been missing over a month. Only the fact that he was still the only one able to share the secret to the cottage in Godric's Hollow kept the Order searching for him - Albus tested regularly whether he could tell Alastor Moody where the Potters lived. 

They were startled out of their mournful silence by a scratching at the front door. Anyone, or anything, at the door was startling. In the two and a half years they'd lived in hiding, visitors had always apparated directly into their front room. It was common courtesy to apparate outside, but courtesy paled in comparison to the risk of drawing attention to where the Potters lived. Without the secret, no one could see the house, but that wouldn't stop Voldemort from burning the entire village to the ground to get to Harry.

Cautiously, Lily approached the door. She could hear pitiful whining from the other side now that she was close. Heart in her throat, she cast a charm that would allow her to see outside without giving anyone there the opportunity to see in. 

A large, black dog was collapsed on the front porch, scratching with one paw at the door. 

"James, summon Poppy! It's Sirius."

"What's serious? Who's out there?"

Lily was frantically undoing the layers of locking charms on the door - their last line of defense if they were somehow discovered. "James. It's  _Siri_."

James' patronus sprung to life in an instant, the proud stag bounding out the door as Lily flung the door open and dropped to her knees, pulling Padfoot into her arms. He whined, obviously in pain, and she loosened her grip on him immediately. 

"Get him inside, Lily."

Lily nodded, and let go of the dog. As carefully and gently as she could, she cast  _mobilicorpus_ to bring him in, settling him on the rug near the hearth. "Sirius," the dog looked to her. "Can you change back?" Slowly, he shook his head in a clear 'no'. "Can I change you back, so we can treat you?" Even more slowly, the dog nodded 'yes'. "This may hurt, Siri.  _Homorphus!_ "

Sirius shouted in pain as his body warped and became human in a grotesque mockery of his usual fluid transformation. James quickly cast a one-way silencing ward around the room to prevent Harry and Primrose from waking up, listening tensely for a baby's cries. He breathed a sigh of relief when none came. 

"James, the latest batch of potions for the Order are boxed up on my lab table. Go get them, please."

"Poppy is on-"

" _Not fast enough,_ James."

James nodded, and walked briskly to the cellar door where Lily's potion lab was set up without any further argument. Lily took stock of Sirius' condition. He was incredibly thin, cuts and open sores littered his body and most were infected. Blood and dirt matted his hair together, and his whole body shook in violent tremors.

Lily conjured a bowl, filled it with water from her wand, and used a mild heating charm on it. Dipping a conjured rag into the water, she began cleaning his wounds by hand. A proper mediwitch could do it magically, but her cleaning charms wouldn't be gentle enough for Sirius' abused and broken skin. James came back into the room with the box of potions, and froze when he got his first real look at his best friend's human form. 

"We shouldn't give him any potions until Poppy comes to do diagnostic charms, but you can get out the essence of murtlap and then heat up some soup," Lily told him in a no-nonsense tone, not stopping cleaning Sirius' wounds. Layers of dirt, blood, and infection came away, and Lily had to vanish the water and rag to refresh them several times. 

The crack of apparation signaled Poppy Pomfrey's arrival just as Lily was starting to apply essence of murtlap to the infected wounds. Lily quickly informed the stunned mediwitch of what she'd done for him, and Poppy immediately began casting diagnostic charms. 

"Dehydrated, malnourished, significant blood loss, broken bones, nerve damage from the cruciatus curse, infection- Sirius, you're lucky to be alive." Sirius only grunted in pain. "Lily, keep at that. He'll need something light to eat before we can put any potions in his stomach, or he'll only be sick."

"James is making soup."

"That'll be perfect," Poppy replied as she ran her wand over Sirius again. "The breaks are too severe to heal by wand, he'll need skelegrow. Blood-replenishing potion, pain potion, general healing potion, murtlap, dittany, food, and rest. His recovery won't be comfortable, but he'll live."

"Oh, thank Merlin," James breathed out, having just come in with a bowl of soup when Poppy gave her assessment. 

"I've got all those potions except skelegrow in the box here, if you don't have them on you, Poppy," Lily said. She didn't express her own relief directly, but it was clear in her voice. 

"Thank you, Lily. When James summoned me, I admit I was expecting one of the little ones to have a fever or to have fallen down."

The two witches had murtlap and dittany applied to Sirius' wounds in minutes. "Can you sit up to eat something, Mr. Black? As soon as you have a bit of soup, we can get to work healing you more."

Sirius nodded, and Lily and Poppy gently shifted him from where he lay on his side into a seated position. Lily brought the sofa pillows over to prop behind his back, and he gingerly relaxed into him when Poppy let go. James got down on the floor with the others, holding the bowl of soup and slowly feeding Sirius, whose hands were shaking too much to do it himself. After a third of the bowl, Sirius shook his head and weakly managed, "No more."

"Put a stasis charm on it, James," Poppy told him. "In an hour or so he can try to eat more. Sirius, you'll need to work back up to eating full meals. Pain potion and general healing potion first, I think. I can't give them all at once, your stomach won't like that any more than it likes food. The general healing potion will take care of any lingering infection before it can worsen and jump start the healing of your nerve endings, and the pain potion will help you get comfortable until your stomach settles enough for more. With the skin wounds healing, blood loss is stabilized so we can hold off on blood replenishing potions for fifteen minutes or so."

Lily took out the potions Poppy listed and passed them to the mediwitch, who helped Sirius to take them. The tension in Sirius' body relaxed away almost immediately once the pain potion was swallowed, and he gave Poppy a grateful look. 

"What day is it?" Sirius asked in a hoarse voice. Whether it was hoarse from disuse or screaming, no one wanted to know for sure. 

James cast a  _tempus_ charm. "The 19th, for about two more minutes," he said with some humor. 

Sirius grinned, then, tiredly but with genuine happiness. "I made it for Prim's birthday."

Lily chuckled, tears forming in her eyes. "You did, Siri." She paused for a beat before asking, "How are you here?"

"They were keeping me in a cell under someone's manor. Took my wand first thing, of course. Tortured me constantly, and laced my food with awful potions. I only ate it every few days, hunger was better than the things they fed me. They wanted the secret." He looked at James and Lily. "I would never give you up. I've said before that I would die for you, and I meant it. Thought I was going to for awhile, but they wouldn't let me die. They haven't been able to get any news since they lost Wormtail, so if they killed me they wouldn't know who to go for next." Sirius paused, taking a shaky breath. "Escaping is a bit of a blur. Every now and then they healed the worst of my injuries, just enough to keep me alive. The last time they did, I knew I had to take the chance to get out. Their wards were too strong for the Order to find me inside them. I transformed into Padfoot when they delivered a meal - bloody difficult without a wand, but I was desperate - I bit the low-level creep who was delivering the food on his wand arm, nearly hard enough to bite it off, and ran before he could lock me in again. Then I followed my bond with Harry and Primrose to get here. I've been walking - two days, maybe? I didn't have a chance to find my wand when I left, so I couldn't apparate or send for help."

Lily, who had been crying openly as she listened, gasped at Sirius' last statement. "The Order! We haven't told them you're here!"

James cast his patronus for the second time that night. "For Albus Dumbledore. Deliver privately. Sirius arrived at the cottage tonight. Poppy is onsite tending to him."

The stag galloped away, and minutes later a silver phoenix swooped into the room and spoke in Dumbledore's voice. "Glad to hear it. Summon me when he is well enough to debrief."

Poppy harrumphed. "You will be resting at least overnight before he's interrogating you, young man. See if you can manage another few bites of soup, and then I'll give you the blood replenishing potion."

"Yes, ma'am," Sirius said lightly. He ate easily enough, and Poppy gave him the potion. While it took effect, she worked to close the few wounds that the dittany hadn't fully healed with a silent  _episky_. 

While the mediwitch monitored Sirius' vitals to ensure he was stable, James transfigured the sofa into a bed so that he'd have somewhere comfortable to sleep while the skelegrow worked. Luckily, Poppy had brought a dose of that particular potion along. When she was satisfied he wouldn't die in his sleep, Poppy levitated Sirius onto the makeshift bed. His ankle was one of several broken bones, so she wouldn't have him standing on it until the next day. 

James and Lily each hugged Poppy in gratitude and kissed the top of Sirius' head in goodnight before going to their room for some long-overdue rest.

 

When Lily went to the nursery the next morning, she frowned. Their cottage only had two bedrooms, so Harry and Primrose shared, but it was already getting crowded in the room and she didn't know what they'd do when the kids got too old for this. She pulled Primrose from her cot first, changing her nappy and dressing her, and then woke Harry. At almost three, he'd been toilet trained for awhile but still wore nappies at night, so she got him cleaned up before letting him choose his own outfit. While he did, she bounced Primrose gently on her hip and addressed her son.

"Someone came over last night, baby. Someone you've been missing a whole lot."

"Unca Siwi?" the child asked, wide-eyed.

Lily made sure she was between the child and the door before nodding. "Yes, baby, Uncle Siri is here. He slept on the sofa last night because he couldn't wait to see you and Primrose.  _But_ ," she added in a you-better-listen tone, "he's injured, baby. You can't throw yourself on him when you go out there. Gentle, okay?"

"Yes, Mama. I'll be gentle."

"Good boy," Lily said with a grin, leaning down to ruffle Harry's hair and help him button the trousers he'd put on. As soon as Lily opened the door, Harry raced into the sitting room and skidded to a stop at the sofa, where James had gotten Sirius sitting comfortably while Lily got the children ready. Primrose reached out to Sirius. Under normal circumstances, a month apart might have been long enough for the one-year-old to forget Sirius, but the same godparent bond that had led Sirius to the cottage lived in her and made him an immediately comforting figure regardless of whether she could actively remember him. 

"Are you okay to hold her while I get breakfast, Siri?"

Sirius rolled his shoulders, subtly testing for pain. "Yeah. She's not so big, yet. C'mere, Prim."

Primrose's birthday was celebrated quietly, cake and a couple of presents with Remus and the Headmaster coming by to join in. Remus was ecstatic to see Sirius again. They'd still been on slightly rocky terms when Sirius went missing, but the month of not knowing if he'd make it back had done away with the last of Remus' reservations.

Dumbledore pulled Sirius aside while Primrose was napping to discuss the events of the last month. When he revealed that he'd been ambushed in his own home, Dumbledore recommended he set up his own fidelius charm. He wouldn't need to stay at home all the time like the Potter family, but it would keep him safer than any other wards that could be placed. Remus raised his eyebrow for only a moment before agreeing when Sirius asked if he'd be the secret keeper. They also arranged for Remus to take Sirius to France to buy a new wand. Ollivander had gone missing a week and a half previous, and Sirius couldn't afford to be wandless until he turned up - if he ever did. 

Primrose ate up the attention all day for her birthday party, even if she didn't yet understand what was happening. Everyone else enjoyed the day as well. They needed this opportunity to be happy. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know Lily wouldn't know if her baby was a boy or girl at twelve weeks, but that's with _muggle_ technology. I headcanon that prenatal readings in the wizarding world are done by reading the baby's magic, and who's to say that you'd have to wait until 18-20 weeks for their magic to know?
> 
> Also, the timelines in this story are all made up. I've deviated a fair bit from the accepted timeline of the first war in this chapter, partially since the "first" war never ended and partially to fit the story line.


	3. Fast Forward

On Harry's seventh birthday, he got his wand. 

A year previously, Dumbledore had discussed the prospects with James and Lily. Dumbledore knew without a doubt that Harry was the child referred to in the prophecy - the one with the power to defeat Voldemort - as he and Neville Longbottom had been the only children born who fit the parameters. When Neville hadn't survived his family's encounter with Voldemort, Harry's place as the Chosen One had been assured. Because it would ultimately be Harry who defeated Voldemort, it was unlikely that the Potters would be able to come out of hiding until Harry was ready to face this destiny, meaning their children would not be able to attend school. The risk of being kidnapped, either in the school or in transit, was simply too high. Harry and Primrose had never even gone outside the cottage that they could remember. (Harry had, before the family went into hiding. Primrose hadn't, having been born under the fidelius charm.)

Therefore, the adults agreed that Harry and Primrose would be privately trained beginning on their seventh birthdays. Dumbledore had resisted starting Primrose's training early in addition to Harry's, but James and Lily insisted that they would not show favoritism to one of their children regardless of the prophecy. Besides, they reasoned, Primrose could be put in danger just as easily as Harry in order to lure the rest of the family out. James, Lily, Sirius, and Remus would do the bulk of the children's training, and Dumbledore would assist whenever he had the opportunity. James and Lily didn't fool themselves into thinking that Dumbledore's opportunities wouldn't  _coincidentally_ align primarily with Harry's training over Primrose's, but his actions were outside their control. The family would train and value both children equally, and leave Dumbledore to act as a war general. 

 

Harry could not go to Diagon Alley to purchase a wand. (Garrick Ollivander had never returned after going missing, but his shop had been taken over by a cousin who was married to a Master Warder.) Dumbledore therefore had enlisted a wandmaker from Amsterdam who had agreed to be obliviated about the location of the cottage and the details of Harry's wand once his work was done. The Potters knew it couldn't have been easy to find a craftsman willing to forget their own work, and were grateful to their war leader for doing it. Choosing a wandmaker from abroad also meant there would be no Ministry Trace on the wand, which was important considering the Order of the Phoenix believed Voldemort could take over the Ministry completely at any moment. 

Dumbledore and Mr. Quest Stirling apparated into the front room at 9 a.m., just on schedule.  The Potter family was sat at the table, finishing breakfast. Very little was 'just on schedule' in this house. Seven-year-old Harry looked up when he heard the crack of apparition, jam smeared on his cheek and toast in his hand, and grinned brightly. Five-year-old Prim, as prim and proper as her name would suggest, sat beside him at the table with her legs crossed at her ankles and ate somewhat clumsily with a fork and knife. No one was entirely sure where she had picked up the manners from, as no one else in the family behaved this way. Lily suspected Sirius of teaching her as a lark. James suspected Remus of reading her the old muggle literature he liked as bedtime stories. Primrose wasn't telling. 

Harry dropped his toast and ran to greet the Headmaster and wandmaker. 

"Harry James, wash your hands and face or I'll have to  _scourgify_ you," Lily told him firmly, causing Harry to turn on one heel to go to the sink and wash up. Dumbledore chuckled good-naturedly in the doorway, while the wandmaker watched more sedately. Once Harry had cleaned himself up (and James had verified), Lily took Primrose's dishes to the sink and the whole family followed Dumbledore and Stirling into the sitting room.

 

"Typically, you would test wands from my stock until you found one suited to your magic. One that chooses you, many would say," James and Lily recognized the odd tone in the wandmaker's voice as a translation charm. "Because I cannot travel with my full stock of wands, I'll be custom-making yours today, young Mr. Potter."

"How does custom making a wand work?" James asked. "Will he get it today?"

"He will, Mr. Potter. Once I've determined the appropriate materials for your son's wand, it will only take me about an hour to construct it. The best way to determine the proper materials is through blood, if you'll allow it."

Lily narrowed her eyes. "How, exactly, will you use his blood, and how can we be assured of Harry's safety?"

Harry watched with wide, confused eyes. Most of this went right over his head at just-turned-seven, with no magical education to speak of. He could read and write very well for his age - and spent a lot of time lost in words since he and Primrose couldn't play outdoors - and maths and a bit of history, but his real magical education was just beginning.

"I would need seven drops, which I would analyze with a spell. One of you may handle the collection and disposal of the blood, and everything I learn from it will be lost when I am obliviated in accordance with my agreement with Albus Dumbledore."

James and Lily made silent eye contact for a moment, coming to an agreement without words, and then turned back to Stirling and Dumbledore. "I'll do it," James said. 

Stirling set his case on the coffee table and opened it. The inside was magically expanded, holding samples of a wide variety of wandwoods and cores as well as the tools of the wandmaker's trade. James and Lily noted there were more than the three cores Ollivander used accounted for, and recognized several like fairy wings and augrey feathers. Stirling took out a knife and dish and gave them to James, who examined them carefully before nodding his approval.

James sat down on the sofa, and gestured Harry towards him. The little boy sat on his dad's lap, and James wrapped an arm around his son. "I'm just going to prick your finger, alright? And then when we have what we need your mum can heal it."

"'Kay, Dad," Harry said with a smile. 

Despite the trust and lack of fear Harry showed, James still hated cutting into his son's finger with the knife. Harry didn't even flinch. He was used to small cuts and scrapes - being a rambunctious child in a small house had led to plenty of them. When the seven drops of blood were collected in the dish, Lily stepped in with a well-practiced  _episky_ and sealed the cut before casting  _scourgify_ to remove the traces of Harry's blood from the blade. 

Stirling took the dish from James and cast a series of specialized charms, analyzing Harry's magic through the sample. He muttered as he did, the translation charm failing to function as he talked to himself. Dumbledore watched calmly as Stirling made arithmancy calculations, which kept the Potters from asking questions. The adult ones, anyway. 

"What's he doing now?" Harry queried, at the same time Primrose asked "Will it be like this when  _I_ get  _my_ wand?"

James and Lily, who usually answered all of their children's questions patiently, both put their fingers to their lips in a gesture for silence. Stirling hadn't asked for quiet, but this didn't seem like the time to talk. They waited and watched while Stirling finished his calculations with a satisfied noise, and started drawing other tools and materials from his case. "You may dispose of the blood sample now," he said offhandedly as he did. 

Lily cast the cleaning charm on the dish silently, not wanting to disturb the wandmaker or miss this opportunity to watch him work. Harry and Primrose took their cues from their parents and also watched quietly, though they squirmed a fair bit more. 

 

It took just under an hour for Stirling to finish the wand. Primrose had nearly wandered off several times, but she wanted to see the moment her brother got his wand. In two years it would be her turn, and she couldn't wait. 

Stirling presented Harry with the newly crafted wand. "Blackthorn and dragon heartstring," he told the family through his translation charm. "A powerful wand suited to a warrior, though he may not be able to bond with it fully until they have been tested together in some sort of trial or danger." 

James and Lily both looked nervous at the idea of their son experiencing trials - they  _knew_ he would have to, that's why they were in this situation after all, but he was only seven and they didn't like to think about it. Dumbledore on the other hand, only looked pleased. "Try it out, my boy," he told Harry.

Harry nervously took the wand from Stirling. It felt warm in his hand, but he could also see now what the wandmaker had meant about not fully bonding with it. It could tell he was untested, and felt like it was holding back. Determinedly, he waved the wand, and it obediently produced a shower of multicolored sparks. Still, Harry felt like the wand was humoring him, they way he knew his parents and uncles did sometimes when he played make-believe. 

His parents hugged him and told him they were proud, and Dumbledore looked at him approvingly, and Primrose looked a bit jealous, so Harry set aside his childish indignance with the wand for the moment. James and Lily paid the wandmaker, and Dumbledore gave him a portkey to leave before performing the pre-arranged obliviation. 

 

At Harry's birthday party that night, his new wand and the beginning of his education were the main topics of conversation. Harry proudly showed off the dark reddish-brown wand. He had decided that he was okay with having to prove himself to his wand, as long as he didn't have to wait  _too_ long. Lily happily taught her son the  _lumos_ charm ("Flick your wand up first then down, like an upside-down V, and focus.") while the other adults worked out the details for Harry's training. 

He would spend a couple of hours each day learning magic, focused mostly on practicals instead of theory, and each of the adults would teach a different subject. James would take transfiguration, Remus would take Defense, Sirius would take Potions, and Lily would take Charms. (Lily was best of them at both Charms and Potions, but Sirius needed to pick one and he matched her more closely in brewing. No one else their age could come close to Lily's aptitude with charmwork.) Dumbledore, when he came by, would teach Harry about History and the war. Harry wouldn't study Herbology, Astronomy, or Flying like Hogwarts students, but none of them could be practically taught in the little cottage.  _After this is all over,_ James promised himself,  _first thing I'll do is buy him a broom._

Just as the schedule was being drawn up, Harry managed to light his wand. Harry smiled as his mum clapped for him, drawing the attention of the rest of his family at the table. Primrose pouted, just a bit, while the adults congratulated Harry.

"Now, don't be like that Prim," James told her gently. "You'll get your own wand when you're seven and then it'll be your turn."

"But that's so  _long_ ," she whined.

"It's still four years earlier than most kids get their wands. If you want, we could wait until you're eleven like I had to."

Primrose could tell her dad was teasing her, but she shook her head vigorously anyway. 

 

The family had cake and played cards until past the children's bedtimes, and then sent Harry and Primrose to their rooms. (When they were five and three, the shared bedroom had become much too crowded and Dumbledore had helped the Potters build an additional room in expanded Wizard Space. The spells had to be redone every six months or so to keep it from becoming unstable, but it was the best they could do. Moving would require a new fidelius charm, and a new secret keeper, and they were running out of people who they trusted to do the job.)

James and Lily said goodnight to Sirius and Remus, and tucked their kids into bed looking forward to the future. Training their seven-year-old so that he could become a warrior, as his wand indicated he should, wasn't how they'd pictured their lives but they had their family and they were happy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The wand information comes from my usual source, Wandlore for Beginners by AJ Cochran on HogwartsIsHere.com
> 
> As a side note, I really enjoy building different wands for Harry in each of my stories that fit who he'll be in each world. While I build the wand, it also helps me to solidify his personality and plan out some scenes based on the wandlore.


	4. Training

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long wait - I'm in my final semester at college right now and almost all of my energy is going into making sure I graduate in May. This chapter isn't terribly long or exciting, but I felt like it was a necessary bridge between Harry receiving his wand and the first... adventure... I'm sending him on. Hopefully I'll be able to get that chapter out soon.

Harry's training began a week after his seventh birthday, once the adults had worked out the finer details of their schedule and their beginning lesson plans. They would essentially begin with the Hogwarts curriculum, hoping to get him through first and second year by the time he turned eight. While they worked Harry through this accelerated curriculum, they would focus on the most practical spells and skim over some of the less useful ones. Most of the adults remembered clearly having to make a pineapple dance in first year Charms, but it wasn't something they'd ever needed to do again. 

Once Harry had finished the first two years of the curriculum, at the time Hogwarts students would be able to choose electives, they would introduce dueling and survival skills. The Potter childrens' education - because Primrose would follow a similar course once she turned seven - would be unique, unlike the well-rounded and sometimes tedious education Hogwarts students received. All of the adults, save Dumbledore, refused to consider too deeply the fact that they were training these children for war.

 

The schedule was as follows: Charms on Mondays, History and the war on Tuesdays, Defense on Wednesdays, Potions on Thursdays, and Transfiguration on Fridays. The classes had been scheduled to stagger wand and non-wand classes intentionally, to keep Harry from becoming too tired. He was still young after all, and wandwork was just that - work. There would be no written homework, but James and Lily would encourage him to practice under their supervision as much as possible in the evenings. 

 

In Charms, Harry was bolstered by his early success with  _lumos_ , so Lily moved on right away to the levitation charm. She taught him well, demonstrating the importance of precise wand movements and good posture, and coaching him through the pronunciation of each syllable before setting Harry to work. The little boy's attention sometimes wandered, forcing her to repeat herself, but she did so patiently and before long the feather she'd conjured was floating near the ceiling.

Harry quickly took to Potions, which he had some experience helping Lily with when he'd been able to focus long enough not to be kicked out of the lab. Sirius taught him the Cure for Boils first, telling him that while its most common use was as a cure when someone had been hit with a  _furunculus_ spell, it was also quite useful for curing naturally-occurring spots. The Cure for Boils had the added advantage of using a wide range of basic preparation techniques, so Sirius was able to assess what Harry had learned while looking over his mother's shoulder.

Transfiguration was a mixed bag. James and Sirius demonstrated the animagus transformation for him, and though he'd seen Padfoot and Prongs before, it was always a treat. James promised him he'd teach it to Harry - eventually. Unfortunately Transfiguration wasn't a subject where a person could take shortcuts around theory or the oddly specific spells used for practice, and Harry had a long way to go before he'd be turning into an animal. James didn't expect his seven-year-old son to  _memorize_ the transfiguration alphabet or formula like he would at Hogwarts, but he did need to study them and understand them well enough to use them with a reference before he'd be successfully transfiguring even a matchstick.

When Remus came to teach Harry Defense, he was excited and horrified in turns. Remus introduced Harry to some common Dark creatures, being careful not to scare him too much, and some basic jinxes and defenses. In Harry's first lesson, he learned how to distinguish between doxies and pixies and the  _vermillious_ charm, which could send up sparks in case you needed to signal something.

In Harry's (loud, frequently stated) opinion, History was the  _worst_. Professor Dumbledore, as Harry had begun to call him, started by teaching him about the International Statute of Secrecy and the formation of the Wizengamot. Harry's parents assured him that these were important things to know - they were both contributing factors to the war, and would be necessary for him to function in the Wizarding World when all of this was finally over - but that didn't make it less dull. Dumbledore was also the least patient of Harry's teachers, because he wanted to progress as quickly as possible to studying the specifics of the war, and Harry often had to have one of his family members re-explain everything. Primrose was the least jealous of her older brother on Tuesdays.

 

Prim's jealousy was something the family regularly had to deal with now that Harry was studying magic. James and Lily were sure to spend as much time as they always had doing fun things with their daughter, but she wanted to do what her brother was doing. After about a month, they decided it would be alright if she read some of the old textbooks they used with Harry while he wasn't using them. They'd assumed she'd get bored quickly and move on - neither child had expressed interest in the textbooks before Harry's training begun - but she devoured them. James would never think of his children as anything but Gryffindors, but Lily was sure Prim would have been sorted into Ravenclaw if she were able to go to school. At five years old, she  _had_ actually memorized the Transfiguration Alphabet, and liked using it to write secret messages to her dad and uncles. Lily couldn't quite decode them, having never been a strong student in the subject.

 

Training quickly became a regular part of the routine in the cottage, and Harry even stopped complaining about his History lessons with the Hogwarts Headmaster. It may have helped that Dumbledore regularly brought sweets, but James and Lily would take the reprieve. All it meant was they needed to send Harry to clean his teeth after he left.

Harry progressed as rapidly through his studies as any of the adults could have hoped. Having one-on-one tutoring really did help with the pace, and as long as the lessons didn't run too long Harry was a good student. The attention span of young children notwithstanding, he understood the importance of what he was learning. Besides, it was  _magic_ , and Harry had always wanted to be able to wave a wand and make things happen the way his family did.


	5. Wands

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is LONG for this story. I don't expect this to become the new norm, but I couldn't find a good place to split it.

A week before Prim's seventh birthday, she changed all of the calendars, clocks, and other time-keeping devices in the house ahead in an attempt to trick her parents and get her wand early. For the ones that needed magic, she bribed Harry to help with a week's worth of chores.

It didn't work. Lily had looked at the calendar, done a double-take, and then cast a  _tempus_ charm to verify. The charm, of course, said the 13th of May instead of the 20th, and the kids were busted. James gave them each a biscuit for the good try, though, so Prim took it as well as she could have.

 

When the day really did arrive, the plan was for Sirius and Remus to mind Harry (who insisted that he was almost  _nine_ and didn't need minding, much to Lily's amusement) so that both of her parents could be there to see Primrose get her wand.

They'd be taking her to France, the same wandmaker who had provided Sirius with a replacement after he'd been captured back in '83. Foreign wands were the only option now for anyone still fighting against Voldemort and his Death Eaters - the Ministry had fallen as predicted a year before. (An interesting side-effect of this was increased diversity among the wands held by the Light witches and wizards of Britain. While Ollivander's had always favored three common cores and a slightly larger array of woods, other wandmakers branched out further. Those with time and money sometimes even traveled to Asia or Australia looking for a truly unique wand to choose them.)

Dumbledore provided the Potters with Polyjuice potion and a portkey - France being too far to apparate, especially with a side-along - and they were due to leave at 10. Sirius and Remus arrived at 9:30 as planned, and James, Lily, and Prim left right on time.

 

Seeing his parents and younger sister disappear, Harry quickly became jealous. The family had been in hiding since Harry was a year old, and this was the first time within his memory that any of them left the cottage. Harry had no memories of the outside world, but now Prim got to travel to  _France_ and see it first hand while he was left behind.

Sirius and Remus saw this jealousy, and tried to distract Harry with a duel. It had been two months since Harry had begun practicing dueling as part of his lessons, so they thought the novelty might be enough to keep his mind off being stuck at home. 

Harry agreed to the duel, but it only served to turn his frustrations in a different direction.

 

Since beginning dueling practice, Harry had been rather forcefully reminded that his wand saw him as untested. It was willing to behave for him while he learned and perfected new spells, but practice duels seemed to be where the Blackthorn wand drew the line. 

It made no sense, in generally everyone's opinion. If the wand wanted a warrior, surely its owner needed to be able to  _practice_ fighting. Alas, telling the wand that simple truth didn't work. (Harry had tried.) In lessons the wand continued to function normally but as soon as Harry faced one of his parents or uncles in a dueling stance it refused to cooperate, causing Harry's spells to stumble out half-formed or fizzle completely. 

Today's duel was no different. Harry was getting rather good at dodging the weak jinxes sent his way, but he could do no more than that. After a few minutes (and only one stinging hex connecting) Harry threw down his wand and sat on the floor with his arms crossed petulantly over his chest. Remus sat beside him, lowering himself and his aching body more gingerly to the floor than Harry had, and healed the mark from the stinging hex.

Harry paid no mind to his uncle. He was staring at his wand, thinking deeply about the day he'd received it.  _Some sort of trial or danger_ , Stirling had said. Clearly, if Harry wanted his wand to cooperate, it was well past time for that trial to happen. It was never going to happen here at the cottage, though. That was why he was at home while Prim was in France, after all. In the eight years they'd lived in hiding, Harry had managed about as much danger as it was possible to at home when he fell out of bed.

A plan began to form in Harry's mind. It wasn't much of one, admittedly, but he was eight years old and willing to improvise. He was left at home because it was dangerous outside, and danger was exactly what Harry needed. He picked up his wand from the floor and tucked it into the forearm holster Remus had given him for his last birthday.

"Can we play hide and seek?"

His uncles looked at him in surprise. "You haven't wanted to play that game with Prim in ages. I thought you were told old for it?" Sirius asked him.

Harry shrugged and looked down. "Might be fun," he mumbled back.

Sirius and Remus traded looks and decided that anything that might distract Harry was a good idea right now, even if it was a bit out of character for the boy. "Alright," they said together.

Harry smiled, then. " _I'll_ seek first, you two hide," he told them imperiously. Sirius helped Remus up from the floor while Harry closed his eyes and began to count. 

When Harry reached the count of ten, however, he didn't begin looking for his uncles. Instead, he went first to the Potions lab and unlocked it with a very quiet  _alohamora._ Inside, he collected the Girding Potion and Wideye Potion he'd brewed in his lessons, which Sirius had said were perfect. Who knew how long he'd be out - energy and endurance could be important. Next, he made a show of walking around in search of his uncles, though he didn't check anywhere they were likely to be hiding. On his way past the door, he cast  _silencio -_ a fifth year Charm, he reminded himself smugly - on the latch and hinges.

He walked around in his "search" a bit longer, to throw off suspicion if Remus had heard him casting and to give himself a pep talk. He could cast  _fifth year_ magic. He would be fine. Never mind that Charms was the only subject where he was anywhere near that advanced, he would be  _fine_. Silently, he thanked his family's love of pranks for giving him such practical lessons in sneaking as he slipped out the silenced front door.

 

On the front step of the house, Harry took a deep breath. Even in the populated village where the cottage was located, the outside world was so  _open_. Before he could lose his nerve, Harry took a step forward. And then another. The third step, he felt magic wash over his skin and realized he was outside the wards on the house. He took another deep breath, picked a direction, and started walking.

 _Here_ was the part where Harry's plan got a bit weak. He knew there was danger outside, but all he could do was walk until some of it found him. In his rather naive mental image of danger he was expecting an animal, or even a person, to jump out at him. He reviewed the offensive spells he knew as he walked -  _expelliarmus, petrificus totalus, flipendo, relashio,_ even  _incendio_ if things started to get bad. If there was a boggart somewhere, he knew how to cast  _ridikkulus_. When Remus had gotten a boggart for him to practice on, it had become a giant snake poised to strike. Harry pictured a snake turning into one of those spring-powered pranking toys he'd seen his uncles give his dad for Christmas one year. He'd be fine.

Harry's mental estimation of danger did  _not_ include people subtly watching him and pressing a finger to the black mark on their left forearm. He hadn't even considered that.

 

Unbeknownst to Harry, Voldemort had a couple of guesses as to where the Potters might be. Before he'd killed Wormtail, the rat had mentioned a cottage, though he couldn't say where it was. His Death Eaters in the Ministry had looked for evidence of ancestral properties in places where a cottage would not be out of place. Generations of Potters had been buried in the cemetery in Godric's Hollow but there was no record of any house in the town owned by the family, making the little village the number one place on Voldemort's list. There were several other towns they were watching as well, but none with such strong evidence as Godric's Hollow.

Knowing the town the cottage might be located in had not even come close to being enough to breach the  _fidelius_ , but the Death Eaters regularly patrolled each town on the list for a situation just like this. It was the main reason all of the Potters' guests apparated into the front room. So as Harry went looking for danger, he got more than he'd anticipated.

 

Harry was nearing the center of the village when he heard a familiar cracking sound behind him. He ducked behind the hedges lining someone's property and looked, and his heart leaped into his throat. Standing a hundred meters away was a wizard Harry had never seen, but recognized all the same. A pasty, noseless face with red eyes, and a bone-white wand could only belong to Voldemort himself. 

Harry cursed himself silently. _Why_ had he snuck out? He wanted to be tested, yes, but not like  _this_. What was he going to do, use the full-body bind on Voldemort? Or the  _disarming charm_? Harry had heard whispered stories while eavesdropping on his parents and uncles at night - Voldemort had been hit with fatal spells and shown back up in battle the next day. Harry's jinxes and charms didn't stand a chance.

Harry couldn't even hope that Voldemort wouldn't see him - the horrific man was staring directly at him with a discerning expression on his face. It took Harry a moment to realize that the other wizard didn't know what he looked like - no one did - and was probably assuring himself he had the right child. Unfortunately, Harry was a near-identical copy of James Potter, with his mother's eyes, and in moments the monster in front of him had determined the same thing. 

Voldemort raised his wand, and Harry did the only thing he could do. He ran. 

Harry actually managed to dodge a couple of spells, watching over his shoulder as Voldemort cast. One of them was a brilliant green, and Harry felt sick as he remembered getting hit by a stinging hex earlier that day. That was no stinging hex, and even getting clipped by it would be the end for him. Harry ran faster, wishing he'd actually  _drank_ the potions he'd grabbed. Behind him, Voldemort hissed, " _Fulguris_ ," and a massive bolt of lightning arced from his wand.

Harry threw himself to the right with quick reflexes born of youth, adrenaline, and six weeks of dodging stinging hexes with an uncooperative wand.

He almost made it. 

Harry enjoyed watching thunderstorms through his bedroom window, but in all the storms Harry watched he had never seen the lightning strike a tree. No one had ever told Harry that lightning seeks a target, which was probably exactly why Voldemort had chosen a lightning curse to hit the agile child.

It was like being stung by a horde wasps from the inside. Harry collapsed to the ground, screaming, and seemed to stay conscious by a miracle or pure force of will. The curse cut off as quickly as it had started, blessedly, and Harry fought his way to his feet. He couldn't run, every muscle in his body was trying to cramp up, so he raised his wand and said a silent plea that it would work. 

" _Expelliarmus!_ " he shouted, desperately, pointing his wand at Voldemort. 

The dark wizard shielded easily, of course, and prepared to cast again when shouts came from up the street. Over Voldemort's shoulder, Harry could see Sirius, Remus, and Dumbledore running to him more quickly than he'd imagined they could. All he could feel was relief that he was saved, despite how much trouble he would be in later for sneaking out. He grinned, and then took one more breath and raised his wand again before the world went black.

 

James, Lily, and Prim came home to an empty house, which they knew should  _never_ happen. They whipped out their wands - all three of them, now that Prim had her own - as they moved into the house. A crack of apparation behind them caused James and Lily to whip around, James moving Prim behind him as he did. 

It was Poppy, but strangely she turned to the front door without saying a word and hurried outside.

The building sense of dread - between the empty house, the arrival of the mediwitch, and the breach of protocol in using their  _front door_ \- was so strong for the parents that they couldn't process. Prim, being seven and not responsible for Harry and unexposed to the horrors of the war, didn't have the same problem. "Mum? Dad? Where is everyone? Why was Madame Pomfrey here? What's happening?"

James only pulled her in close to his side. 

Suddenly the door flung open again, and James and Lily both raised their wands on instinct. To their horror, Poppy was bringing Harry in on a conjured stretcher, followed by Sirius, Remus, and Albus - all of whom were very out-of-breath. 

"James, Lily, thank Merlin you're back," Sirius breathed out. "Harry- he snuck out- he met-" Sirius' voice broke off, very uncomfortingly. 

Poppy immediately went to work on Harry, having run her diagnostic charms while the stretcher carried the child home. 

"Is he-" Lily couldn't say the words, but Poppy understood.

"He's alive," she said briskly, "and he should stay that way, but I need to work quickly to prevent permanent damage to the nervous system. One of the others can fill you in."

James and Lily turned wide, questioning eyes to the other two Marauders in the room. Remus sighed heavily, and gestured to the open sofa in a clear ' _We should sit'._

James and Lily sat. Prim plopped herself down on the floor between them, clutching at James' robe hem, and Remus enlarged the sofa before he and Sirius took a seat on either side of the worried parents.

"He snuck out," Sirius said again, his voice thick with guilt. "Said he wanted to play hide and seek. We knew it was odd for him, but he'd been so upset since you left that we just hoped to keep him distracted."

"He told us to hide while he looked for us. I noticed he was gone first," Remus said. "He used a silencing charm on the door, but I noticed that his footsteps had gone quiet. We checked the house as quickly as possible, to make sure he was really missing. He can't have been alone for more than a few minutes."

"I summoned Albus as soon as we knew," Sirius said quietly. "Luckily he was somewhere he could apparate from. We got outside and-" Again, Sirius' voice broke off before he could say who had hurt Harry, and James and Lily's stomachs sank.

"It was Voldemort himself," Albus said gravely. "He struck Harry, who was fleeing, with a lightning curse." Prim, having been mostly forgotten on the floor, gasped. "That appears to be the only spell to have hit him."

"He'll be okay?" Prim asked softly.

Albus smiled gently at her. "I have every faith that Poppy will be able to help him. She responded very quickly to my summons, and the curse that hit him rarely causes lasting damage on its own."

Prim nodded, and Lily pulled her daughter onto her lap and held her tightly. The group sat quietly until Poppy addressed them, nearly an hour later. 

"He's stabilized. There should be no lasting internal damage - thankfully with magical healing we don't have many of the same worries muggles would with a lightning strike - but it will scar."

Lily bit her lip while Albus looked inordinately pleased. "There's nothing to be done about the scarring?" James asked the mediwitch.

She shook her head. "I needed to focus on the internal injuries - a lightning curse can injure every organ in the body simultaneously, and many of them cannot be healed if left too long. The burns to his skin were my last priority, and by the time I reached them it was too late to prevent scarring.

The twinkle in the headmaster's eye only increased, and Lily turned a hard look on him.

"Voldemort gave him those scars.  _He will mark him as his equal._ "

James saw the familiar fire in his wife's eyes, the fire that said whoever had angered her would soon regret it, but he knew Primrose needed Lily's comfort and didn't want Harry to wake up to shouting so he stepped in. "Albus, maybe you should go for now. I think our family needs some time to process what's happened and to try to get Prim's birthday back on track without a prophecy and a war getting in the way."

"Yes, perhaps I should," Albus said, not even bothering to look chastised. With a perfectly calm goodbye, the old man apparated away.

 

Harry woke up only minutes later and his entire family pulled him into a group hug, drawing a slight hiss as they made contact with his still-sensitive skin. "What were you  _thinking_?" James whispered.

"I just wanted my wand to work for me," Harry said, shamed. "I'm sorry - I knew it would be dangerous, but I thought I could handle it. I didn't think-"

"It's okay, Harry," Lily told him as he began to sniffle. "You're okay."

One by one, each of them withdrew from the hug. Prim took the longest to let go of her brother. 

"Sorry, Prim, I didn't mean to ruin your birthday... Did you get your wand?"

Primrose sniffed a bit and rubbed her eyes. "It's not ruined, you jerk," she said, clearly trying to hide the fact that she'd been crying. "And yeah. Hazel with unicorn  _and_ demiguise hair."

"Do you remember what the wandmaker said, Prim?" Lily asked her.

She nodded a bit. "Hazel wands are sensitive to emotions, so I shouldn't let mine run too wild, and they're very _loyal_ wands. It might even die when I do, especially since it's also unicorn."

"And what about the cores?"

"The unicorn is good for Healing, Charms, and Transfiguration, and the demiguise boosts Transfiguration even more and makes the magic more subtle." She broke out in a grin. "Oh, I can't  _wait_ to learn Transfiguration, Dad. When can we start? I already know the alphabet and the formula."

James tore his eyes away from Harry and smiled indulgently at Prim. "Well, Harry got to learn a spell on his seventh birthday. What do you say to giving the matchstick to needle transfiguration a shot now?"

Prim nodded excitedly, and James excused himself to get a match after squeezing Harry's hand. Lily took his place by their son and brushed the hair out of his face.

"He'll need rest," Poppy said, startling Lily, Sirius, and Remus. "but I daresay as long as he's sitting comfortably he can join the family for Primrose's birthday dinner." Lily nodded, and the mediwitch turned to Harry. "You'll be sore for a few days, young man. Take things easy until  _all_ of the pain has gone."

"Yes, Madame Pomfrey."

"Would you like to stay to eat, Poppy?"

The mediwitch smiled. "That would be lovely, Lily, if you'll have me."

"Of course, Poppy," Lily said with a genuine smile back. "Now, Harry.  _Promise_ me you'll never do something like that on your own again."

"I promise, Mum," Harry said.

Lily looked into his eyes and could see that he was genuine. "Okay. I think a near-death experience is punishment enough, then. You've learned your lesson."

 

By dinner, Primrose had mastered the beginning Transfiguration exercise James had been teaching her. The family - plus Poppy, who was practically family after the number of times she'd been called to treat the kids' ills - enjoyed a quiet dinner together with birthday cake afterwards for dessert. Everyone had recovered from the scare Harry gave them enough to enjoy themselves, though Sirius and Remus had to put the moment when they realized he was gone out of their minds rather forcefully. 

Only once the celebration was finished, the kitchen cleaned, and the children put to bed did Lily turn to James with pain in her eyes. "There's no denying it now. Our son really is the Chosen One, isn't he?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Medical information in this chapter about being struck by lightning comes from the internet, so it may not be totally accurate. Sources include accounts from people who've survived lightning strikes, a how-to on lightning strike first aid, and images of lightning strike scars. 
> 
> If you search lightning strike scar on Google Images, you can see several examples of the type of scarring Harry has. The images there aren't especially graphic, either. It's called fractal scarring. 
> 
> Two guesses where my wandlore comes from - first one doesn't count.


	6. Prophecy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! I've challenged myself to update all of my non-hiatus WIPs in one day, starting with the one that had been sitting the longest. This is my third story in that chain. It's only been sitting for about two months, which isn't honestly that bad compared to some of my stories. 
> 
> The reason I've been blocked on most of my stories is because I was in my last semester of college/university, and since I'm mentally ill I had to put pretty much all of my energy into making sure I graduated. It's official now, I did it, and I have a degree and lots of spare time so hopefully updates will come a little more frequently.

_"Expelliarmus!"_ Harry cried out, brandishing his wand. " _Stupefy!_ "

The second spell connected, and the animated dummy that Harry had been practicing with froze in place. "Two minutes and thirty-eight seconds," Remus told him proudly. "Once you can shut the dummy down in under two minutes, we'll turn the difficulty level up."

The dueling dummy had been a gift from Flitwick, who Harry had only heard stories of, given to the Potter children through Professor Dumbledore. The adults still practiced with them sometimes - especially with Harry, whose magical training was nearly two years ahead of Prim's - but the dummy was excellent because its ability level could be easily and accurately changed. When Harry dueled against his family members, they sometimes struggled to find the right level where he would be challenged but still able to work and improve.

Harry smiled while he stretched out his scarred arm. The scars from the lightning curse pulled oddly and ached when he did something as active as dueling. Harry knew it was something he would have to get used to - the scars were permanent, and he needed to be able to fight - but it wasn't comfortable.

Remus gave Harry  _the look_ as he stretched. It was the same look all the adults in the family gave Harry when they saw evidence of his ill-advised adventure. Pity, mixed with guilt, mixed with  _Well, what did you expect?_ It had taken Harry awhile to work out each of the parts, but they'd been giving him that look at least once a day now for three months and it had become very familiar.

The silver lining in all of this was that Harry's plan had at least  _worked_. Facing the most evil wizard alive, being hit by a curse, and holding himself together enough to retaliate and survive was apparently enough of a test for the Blackthorn to mark an eight-year-old as a warrior. His wand hadn't misfired or failed to perform a known spell since that day.

 

It was August now, and Harry had turned nine. The dummy had, in fact, arrived right around his birthday. His Defense lessons were progressing rapidly now that he was actually able to duel. Harry's lesson was finished for the day, but he was helping Remus teach Primrose next. As much as possible, Harry was involved in Prim's lessons in this way. It was a good way for him to review the material, and Prim was progressing rapidly through her lessons.

Privately, Remus thought Primrose might be able to take the same lessons as Harry within the year at the rate she was going. He wasn't sure how Harry would feel about that.

Today she was learning the knockback jinx. Harry hadn't been ready for this for about five months of his study, compared to Primrose's three, but either he hadn't noticed the pace she was going at or he didn't mind. Remus initially demonstrated the spell for Prim, then asked her to demonstrate how she thought it should be done. Next, Harry pointed out the things she could correct (and how to do that without being mean had practically been a whole lesson for him), and Primrose tried again. Harry and Remus would alternate giving corrections to her technique until she produced the spell properly. Once that happened, Harry and Prim practiced the spell together.

It had been Sirius who had thought of the method - Harry was still struggling a bit in transfiguration, since he didn't like theory, and this made practice easier for him. Sirius was rightly proud of himself for the idea, and each of the adults who taught Harry had adopted it. Each of them aside from Professor Dumbledore, at any rate, and the professor rarely had time to teach Primrose history.

 

Harry's History of Magic curriculum with Professor Dumbledore always focused on how historical events contributed to the climate of the current war. (Professor Dumbledore still called it a war, even though Harry's family privately thought the Order was more of a rebellion than an army or resistance, given that Voldemort had now held the Ministry for a year and a half and was threatening to take Hogwarts.) This curriculum had included topics like the International Statute of Secrecy and its effects on present-day relations with muggles, the transition from a Council of Lords to the democratic Ministry of Magic and its effects on pure-blood supremacy, the war with Grindelwald, the publication of the Pure-blood Directory, and the somewhat recent marches for Squib rights and the riots that resulted from them.

(James and Lily sometimes objected to the curriculum that Albus taught their son. Not everything was age-appropriate, but Albus was thinking first as a war leader and as an educator of children second.)

Recently, Professor Dumbledore had begun teaching Harry a certain, more specific history. The history of Tom Marvolo Riddle, who later became Lord Voldemort. It was important to know and understand your enemy, Professor Dumbledore told Harry, as anything could become important at any time.

Albus had told Harry about the prophecy during the week he spent recovering in bed after the lightning curse, much to James and Lily's conflict. They believed in being honest with their son, of course, but they weren't sure if the immediate aftermath of Harry's meeting with Voldemort was the best time to tell him.

After Albus had left that day, James and Lily had spent a long time making sure that Harry knew and understood that the prophecy gave no time frame, so it was important that he take all the time he needed to grow up and learn magic, to make sure that he would be the winner when they had to fight.

They also had to tread carefully around the importance of Harry's prophesied role in the war, to ensure he wouldn't get a big head like his father had once had. James and Lily, after that day, often told Harry non-graphic versions of war stories. Harry learned about friends of his parents' who had died fighting for the freedom of the wizarding world. Names like Marlene McKinnon, Gideon and Fabian Prewett, and Benjy Fenwick became household names to the Potters. It was with great hesitance that James and Lily told their children about the Longbottoms, who had died in part because of the prophecy. 

 

While James and Lily ensured that their son would understand the importance of everyone who fought and died in this war, Professor Dumbledore made sure he would understand his enemy. To this end, he finally slowed the pace of their history lessons into something more manageable for Harry. This was good, considering Harry's family knew very little of what Albus was currently teaching him and wouldn't be able to recap the lessons in the same way.

Harry learned about Merope Gaunt and the muggle Tom Riddle, and how she bewitched him with a love potion and he abandoned her when she stopped administering it. Harry learned about the damage to the mind that love potions caused in babies - Tom Marvolo Riddle's fundamental lack of the ability to love naturally.

Harry shuddered as he learned about the orphanage where Voldemort had grown up. For a child already hurt by his parents' actions, it wasn't a good place to grow up. Harry was still a child, and didn't understand the raising of children the same way adults did, but his different perspective was no less valuable. He knew what he wanted as a child very clearly - more so than any adult could hope to remember - and he could see the clear lack of it in that orphanage.

Professor Dumbledore relayed to Harry the stories that the Matron at the orphanage had told him about young Tom Riddle, and the added details he'd found when he went digging during Tom's years at Hogwarts. Harry learned about the cruelty that Voldemort had displayed even at a young age, that child who did not understand love and who had no one to provide him support. The way that Tom Riddle would hurt the other orphans - physical pain, fear, the loss of pets and possessions - and the way that he spoke of it proudly.

Once they reached Voldemort's school years, Professor Dumbledore shared memories with Harry in a pensieve as often as possible. Harry saw the cold way that Voldemort acted even at eleven, just barely older than Harry was now. Harry watched through Professor Dumbledore's eyes as Voldemort learned to hide his unsettling coldness behind a charming mask, and searched for his family history until he discovered his descent from Salazar Slytherin. 

 

Lessons with Professor Dumbledore were usually followed with sweets and family time to cheer Harry up, but James and Lily could see the way these lessons were affecting their son. Being forced to cope not only with the knowledge that he had a fated enemy but with the knowledge of what that man had done was forcing him to mature too quickly. They knew their war stories were not keeping him any younger, but if their son was going to grow up before his time then they were going to make sure he at least grew up well.

More than once, Harry's family asked Albus if he was sure Harry needed to learn all of this  _now_. He would look at them sadly when they did, the regret for what he had to do visible in his eyes, and remind them that as hard as the Order fought the war would not end until Harry was capable of ending it. The wizarding world could not wait for Harry to grow up completely, though they would wait as long as they needed to to ensure Harry could win, or there would be no world left for Harry to save. "If not now," Albus told them, "When?"


End file.
